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It’s no secret…the last couple weeks have been rough. And a lot of it has been a mental/emotional struggle and frustration at not being able to reach my goal. It has been suggested that I change my previous post in order to not put people off or seem ungrateful. I’m not going to for two reasons: 1) What I wrote is me, it’s how I felt at that time. 2) I want to share my struggles in case anyone else is feeling the same way. I know I’m not alone. Whether it’s in fundraising, or day to day relationships, or the workplace, or even in our fitness & nutrition routines…when we don’t get feedback from our peers, self doubt rears its ugly head and plays tricks on our minds. It’s what we do when that happens that matters. We need to press on, stick close to those who lift us up, and shoulder our way past the negative/frustrating obtacles. As with most things in my life, I have been going about this whole process the wrong way. I have taken control and want to do it my way and in my time. That’s just not how it works. Whenever I take the reigns, things tend to get messy and words end up lost in translation. I need to remember that God is in control. (Yes, even in fundraising.) When I hand my projects and problems over to Him in prayer, he never lets me down. I may not get the answer I want, in the time I want. Most often, though, I get something better. And just so you know, whoever may be reading, I am so very grateful for every person who has given and every penny that has been donated to my fundraising and the cause as a whole.

Matthew 6:34
So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

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Update:  About an hour and a half after I wrote this and posted it, my running partner Jessica handed me a check for $250.  Her sister had used her company’s charity fund to donate to both of our fundraising goals.  When I let go of the wheel, I am allowing God to show his mercy and grace.  Thank you Lord, Jessica and Meredith!